What those first families had was each other: a parent who’d been through it, on the phone with a parent who was just starting. One family worked something out and passed it on, and the next family did the same.

Someone would ask for something that didn’t exist yet, and instead of pointing them somewhere else, we built it. When the young adults in one program reached the end of it with nowhere to go next, the next program was the answer. We’ve never called ourselves autism experts. The people living it are the experts. Our job is to listen closely enough to build what they need.

In a big agency, autism is one department among many, competing for everything. Here, it’s the whole reason we exist. It also means the people in every program work side by side, so when you’re ready for something new, they already know you.

Seven of us have been doing this work for more than ten years, and two for more than twenty. So the person who answered when your child was two, and the word autism was four days old, might still be here when he’s twenty-six and learning to live on his own. You don’t have to explain yourself all over again. Someone already knows the story.